Crisis management
There was once my sister realised and summarised the difference between how she and husband handle crisis: she prefers pre-crisis while he prefers post-crisis. Basically, pre-crisis management means trying to minimise the chance of that crisis happening while post-crisis means managing the effects of the crisis after it happens.
I thought that was a neat summary and initially thought that it also approximately describes a difference between Ban and me too.
As an example, when I have appointment with friends at an unknown place, I will look or ask for the exact address, look up on Google maps for the route and then if needed, take a look at my GPS device to determine whether it recognises that address or do I need to fudge the address entry around to get it to work. All these done hours before I depart.
As for Ban, if the address is somewhat familiar, he'll do nothing until he sets off. While driving, if he feels that he needs help, then only will he look at the GPS device and deal with whatever problem there and then. If the address is not familiar, then he'll look up Google Maps beforehand for the route.
Ban's way is not my way because in my opinion it just causes unnecessary stress that can easily be prevented or significantly minimised with some planning (i.e. pre-crisis management). However, note the difference: it stresses me but not him.
In our discussion about this, I realised one thing: he is already doing his best and in fact given his proclivity towards disorganisation, it is already pretty good.
You know what's a funny outcome out of that discussion? I feel more at ease and at peace with his planning decisions henceforth, knowing that he's doing at a level that is essentially quite extraordinary for him. If I want stuff to be done in a certain what that's beyond him, then I should do it and not him. If I don't, then so be it and I'm fine with it.
Love you much, Ban, for doing your best :)
I thought that was a neat summary and initially thought that it also approximately describes a difference between Ban and me too.
As an example, when I have appointment with friends at an unknown place, I will look or ask for the exact address, look up on Google maps for the route and then if needed, take a look at my GPS device to determine whether it recognises that address or do I need to fudge the address entry around to get it to work. All these done hours before I depart.
As for Ban, if the address is somewhat familiar, he'll do nothing until he sets off. While driving, if he feels that he needs help, then only will he look at the GPS device and deal with whatever problem there and then. If the address is not familiar, then he'll look up Google Maps beforehand for the route.
Ban's way is not my way because in my opinion it just causes unnecessary stress that can easily be prevented or significantly minimised with some planning (i.e. pre-crisis management). However, note the difference: it stresses me but not him.
In our discussion about this, I realised one thing: he is already doing his best and in fact given his proclivity towards disorganisation, it is already pretty good.
You know what's a funny outcome out of that discussion? I feel more at ease and at peace with his planning decisions henceforth, knowing that he's doing at a level that is essentially quite extraordinary for him. If I want stuff to be done in a certain what that's beyond him, then I should do it and not him. If I don't, then so be it and I'm fine with it.
Love you much, Ban, for doing your best :)
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