Telling problems

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When women tell men problems they have, most of the time they are not asking men for solutions. They are usually seeking empathy and understanding. In fact, some may get offended if men offer solutions and some even go further in accusing men for not understanding them.

For me, of course I agree that firstly, I hope that the listeners (men or women) understand my problems. However, I would definitely welcome and treat it as a bonus if they provide solutions.

Seriously, why not? Why don't listen to their suggestions to solving your problems? Maybe they have great ideas. No harm in bouncing ideas with them, isn't it? If you are tired and just want to pour out your problems, then that, to me, is a separate issue. Just say, "Thanks for your suggestion but I'm tired and just need some understanding." There's no need to be grumpy about it. It's an unhelpful reaction.

I gather that most of the time the frustration comes from listeners who jump straight to solutions without giving proper thought to the problem and how the person feels about that problem. That itself then lends credence to the conclusion, "Haiz, you don't understand lah."

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