If only...

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...and so she asked the two Harringtons to come, but Harriet was ill, and so Pen was forced to come by herself-" 
Elizabeth presently drew her Katana and cut off Lydia's head, which fell into the open hatbox. 
The others looked on in a state of silent shock as a torrent of blood sprang forth from Lydia's neck, staining their dresses. Elizabeth sheathed her blade, and in a most delicate tone, said "I beg you all forgive me, but I could stand her prattling no longer." However, when she spared another glance toward Lydia, she was surprised to see her head very much attached. 
"Lord! How I laughed!" continued her younger sister. "And so did Mrs. Forster. I thought I should have died." 
Elizabeth sighed. If only she could really cut off Lydia's head.

- "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" by Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith

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